Break Out the Umbrellas::

Hey guys,

Just a quick update! The school semester has begun, yet again. It is kind of sad that I am still at OCC for my THIRD year...=) But I am getting a lot accomplished this time. I managed to get into my A and P class during the few days of registration, so I know that it was all God on that one! It is a great class, and I love the lab (so far!) My teacher is wonderful and easy to understand. It IS a LOT of memorization, but luckily I have already been familiarized with many of the topics. In fact, I'm sort of ahead in the class, and my teacher has put me in charge of helping the other students and quizzing them, etc. That is sort of scary, but I like the challenge.=) The other classes I'm taking are:Positive Psych (with my old teacher Prof Cross), Alcohol and substance abuse (just for fun and because it is interesting), English (unknowingly Angela Scali is in it with me!!!) and A and P with a lab... I am at school from 10-9:30 on Mondays, and 10-7:20 on Wednesdays, and have also picked karate back up with Mr. M during “college hour.” So far it's been fun, but because my classes are M W, midterms are going to be CRAZY! But I will worry about that when it comes time...

Besides that, I've just been working at the Mode, and trying to get my essay finished to send to school. Every day I look forward to Florida more and more, it's very exciting. My dislike for guys still continues, and have been thoroughly annoyed with them. It's a bad feeling... But what can I say? All is forgiven in my head, but I'm afraid that it's not so in my heart just yet. I really am working on it, but the days swing from feeling like I deserve better then what they had to offer, and the next I'm thinking that “what was wrong with me? Why don't they like me?” You know, stupid things like that...But I was talking to my co-worker Bekkah, and I just told her straight out that I desired (and need!) someone who loves Jesus as much as I do. She just said, sweetie good luck. It is an emotional adjustment from being excited to share your day with someone, to not being able to do that. Every day I recognize that void, but I'm trying to fill it with quiet time and other relationships...I do have Gabe though.=) I get so lonely when she goes away for games...Shh don't tell her I said that! I'm definitely not forcing the issue of romantic relationships, as I think God is telling me I need some “simmering time” and some alone time with Him. So that is good!

I read that book Perpetua a few weeks ago. It was one of the most moving, deep, and truthful book that I have read in a long, long time! I was so touched by it that I told Mom the whole story one day after I finished it. The point of view is from an unbeliever, who none the less becomes one after witnessing a human sacrifice (a baby she had taken care of) and had all these spiritual battles inside afterwards...And becoming a Christian in that era meant certain death, but found joy in that anyways. I don't know, it was just an amazing story that touched me in ways that I didn't expect. I cried, as silly as it sounds, especially at the end. Here was this girl, 20 years old, who had seen so many horrible things, lost so many people, and finally she had a husband and a baby boy she had waited for so long to have. Yet she knew that her circle of Christians, her family, were soon going to be martyred. As much as her flesh wanted to spend more time with them, and not to be parted by death, she was at peace and joyous in her fate. I guess I could relate, because my deepest desire is to have a family of my own, but I would give that all up for my faith. In fact I wish that Americans faced the same thing! How much closer through persecution we are able to be to God! When everything is taken away, you are only left with one thing, but that thing is THE MOST IMPORTANT! A lot of life seems so trivial, and I know that I get caught up in things that do not matter at all. It makes me feel so ashamed, because I want to know the beauty of suffering for something so incredible.

Back to the books I go. =) See you guys in less then two weeks! We've got to plan some other fun things just in case the snow still hasn't come... For your sake, we're praying for snow. Thanks a lot! Do you remember what going to OCC was like in the winter?! =P Love you!